new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
I'm drinking screwdrivers in the pool naked. Call 911 if I don't check in regularly
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
You're the only person that can successfully use titties and Jesus in the same sentence.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
Of the two of us, which one has licked a drag queen's tit in the past 5 days?
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
You danced?!
I just jiggle to the beat like a sexy lava lamp
He ripped my sink off my bathroom wall and then threw up in it.
Randomize
