Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
it was literally the size of a crayloa marker. i didnt know what to do with it so i just sat there
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
YOU KNOW BRAZILIAN BOYS ARE MY WEAKNESS
A duck just looked me in the eye whilst I peed in a lake. I feel so dirty.
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
avocado toast wont fix the fact you did a bunch of blow you fucking hipster
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
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