True true and the only thing that will burn more than the vodka we will consume is the shame in our loved one's eyes
And yet we make it a tradition to get inappropriately drunk at family functions. We amaze me.
At least it's not a funeral this time... I feel we're making improvements.
you should wait a day or two to break up with your girlfriend
why?
so we can have sex in the meantime. It adds a little excitement.
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I CAME AT YOU WITH RAW FEELING
you grabbed my dick through my pants and hissed at me.
Oh my god, I hid a wine bottle in my boot.
Dude. I kneed him in the face and gave him a black eye. It's like a constant reminder of our hookup. I feel like herpes. I never go away...
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I mean...he was throwing up for almost 3 consecutive hours. I don't think there's a chance in hell that would have tasted even close to tolerable.
Whether ya want it or not, it's gonna happen. Assimilate to the gay
Now I just sit back and wait to give ass birth to pure evil.
He does have a nice smile. I also like to think he has a nice penis, but that's just a prediction.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
Butt Stuff 2016 unites us all
He doesn't have an existential crisis after we have really violent sex now which is nice
She made me keep my boots on and say "you're welcome darlin" after every orgasm......so yes it was an awesome night.
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