It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
ur penis kinda felt like a vagina to me
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
Dont judge me. Him and his friends got me drunk for free, the least i could do was suck his dick
She told me she wanted to wax my ass. I'm terrified and oddly aroused.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
He drove over an hour to get this shit done. I guess i win the golden vagina award tonight
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
Randomize
