whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
my mind is a poorly written porno when i'm drunk.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
she named my penis "gigantor the baby arm"
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Bryan's allergic to that cheap detergent, so he's been naked for three days. But we're all used to it now, so the party is still on.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
If I die, let him know that his penis was the last penis I saw. And I'm happy about that.
It gave me the St Patrick's Day nickname Slutty McShitfaced. I've never felt so understood.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
Went home w the NY Islander in a NY Rangers jersey, needless to say he was pissed
Just accidentally walked into a parade for Jesus
We were in bed, and he looked at me and asked if I'd be weirded out if he took his leg off. BEST.SEX.EVER.
Can we just agree for a moment that semen in your sinuses is the fucking worst?
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