The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
i just witnessed two asians having sex for the first time ten feet away from me..hes having a seizure..what the duck is going on???
the guy was wearing a viagra shirt, i knew what i got myself into.
apparently breaking a beer bottle and then throwing up in a urinal is a terrible way to pick up girls.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
Well for better or worse the home brew is almost done, want to get drunk/loose your sight tonight?
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I woke up to my bra draped over his lamp and a huge bump on my head. apparently, I face planted while having sex in the shower..
Just realized tomorrow is the anniversary of the time Dean and I glued DJ's leg back together with Neosporin and an Ace bandage. I'm bringing red velvet cupcakes to the party to celebrate.
Dude get over here. Steven brought super soakers filled with colored vodka.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
Randomize
