I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
Thank you for leaving pool of vagina on my girlfriends carpet.
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
i wish i had a super power and that that super power was shooting out mdma from my fingertips or something
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
You didn't hold all these dicks to become a party planner!
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Randomize
