I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
I just tried to pee in a pad to see if it was like a diaper. it's not.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
you were just eating all his cookies and kept mumbling "them crumblies" when the crumbs got on your shirt.
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
its all coming back to me in waves....waves of humiliation and nausea.
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
Just assume that every drink in that house has alcohol in it.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
On a scale of 1 to i should hide, how deep did i dig my grave?
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
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