no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
How am I supposed to spread my seed with you "modern women" and your birth control?
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
She kept saying "I'm going to hell" the entire time we were fucking. I really wasn't sure what to do... so I agreed with her.
That was definitely the right answer.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
Was I shouting at a fire engine last Friday?
explain the broken jalepenos in my underwear drawer?
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Thursday is not a good day to become a felon... It's bingo night
All I want is a hot dog on a Saturday at 2:19 is that to much to ask?!
Ugh. I just found a cum stain on my mermaid pants. Now I can't return them.
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