it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
i just ate two sandwiches and am debating booty calling my landlord
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
he went to the bathroom at 5am only to come back and squeeze my boob before going back to sleep
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Fuck the library it's too quiet and makes me uneasy. I feel like I'm so isolated I should take off my pants or something
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
I just found your "it's drinking time" note in my chem notes. Why did this never happen??
I was waiting for you to find it...I'll be over in 5
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