Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Hi, this is ****, we hooked up a few weeks ago. I was wondering, do you have any STDs?
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
worse things have happened to me. but if it will make you feel better you can pay for my therapist sessions next week.
I gave her a mint afterward. It felt like giving turndown service at Hotel BJ.
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
that was you who tried to jump in front of my car in the monkey suit wasnt it
I think I may be stoned foreverrrrrrrrr. The earth has been around for a long time.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
I walked in on him fucking my best friend. I think we've reached the point of following each other on twitter.
Made my roommate send me tit pics so I could send them to someone because I didn't want to move.
Literally I can feel my heart beat in my vagina because of how sore I am
Randomize
