His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I was talking to some girls while you were falling off your bar stool into the person next to you.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
If I woke up in a pillar of smoke I suppose that's a sign right
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
HIGH AS FUCK. JUST WATCHED THE TRIPPIEST VIDEO EVER. IM NOT SCARED OF PANDAS. I GOTTA GO. TRIPPIN AGAIN
I know you told me I shouldn't go see him...that's why I'm texting you letting you know I made it home safe from his house this morning
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
LOOK AT HOW SMOOTH THIS BITCH IS
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