I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
its sad that the first thing i assume is that ur trying to indirectly tell me you fucked on a breakfast table
by asking you if you bought one for the apartment?
you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
and he thought i came like four times in 2 mins. my leg just kept cramping up
I didn't think it was possible but there may actually be TOO MANY pictures of me tagged shotgunning.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
On my way home I stopped at target and bought beer and galoshes. I am a planner.
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
He wore my sunglasses on his honeymoon..... so there's that.
I'm so high I would give anything in the world to be inside my lava lamp right now
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Escorted out of jimmy johns because I refused to leave with my dog. Stole a loaf of bread on the way out.
He is like the "hometown sweetheart", but a huge freak. Like "I'll come change your flat tire"....but then fuck you like an animal in the back seat.
We fucked like animals and then decided we actually liked each other so then we made love. It's a match made in heaven.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
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