I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
No. And Marissa said shitting in the handicap bathroom at work does not get you into the club. You have to shit yourself. She said.
I think my uterus is still laying in your bed somewhere under the covers.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
he said good things come in small packages and I decided to hook up with someone else
No night ever ends well that starts with "you know what this needs? More tequila".
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
You said this was your mistake shot and then vomited on the tv. Never forget.
I woke up missing my shoes and my left eyebrow. MY. EYEBROW.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
Randomize
