What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
It's gotten to the point where even copying off yahoo answers is still way too much work.
Well, we missed our public lewdness court date. Looks like were going to jail in Alabama ...
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
you taught an eight year old how to shotgun a half pint of chocolate milk, that's all i'm saying
Pretty sure I picked a cat up off the street and took him home with me, fed him tuna, then let him go
how do you expect me to pass the time when I'm too old to be jailbait but too young to legally drink
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
Dont worry, the Canadians are more afraid of you then you are of them.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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