piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
We went out. i got lost. dunno where they were. they slept in the car. i slept in an outdoor shower. i dont know anything else.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Gees I domt know what your deal was. You kept looking at Nick and shaking your head frantically and doing a weird motion with your hands
Tgat was the small dick alert
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
drinking vodka, listening 2 smh at 530am slow cooking beef stew. you'll enjoy the stew and worry abt me in the morning. bon apatite
I know he works a lot but c'mon man. I 69'd you the first week we boned. Put a little effort in. Fuck.
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Just do what I do and listen to your vagina. She’ll growl when she smells good dick
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