I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
he cracked the bottle of jager at 11am and said "hey, its Saturday and I gotta do something"
He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
i just sold back the books i vomitted on
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
if there weren't so many witnesses I 100% wouldve punted that squirrel
I'm watching intervention which is getting me psyched for your birthday. Is that wrong?
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
Maybe it's because I walked straight up to that shelf of vodka with a look of determination that said "I mean business".
I usually have to have a cart! If that doesn't say "I mean business" then I don't know what does
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
He just texted me a video of him jerking off. He must really be looking forward to the Super Bowl.
if I dont text you back in 10min assume i am in fact still dizzy and injured myself in the shower. and call an ambulance. thanx.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
The only thing good about being back at work is the lunch time hand jobs from the MILF
Randomize
