I was at the bar last night dancing, puking in a trash can, and ordering another drink all at the same time. Have I lost my dignity?
haha no as long as you did hook up with anybody after that.
... oops
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
Learn some fucking English or leave me alone! "Your" is for something that belongs to you, like 'your herpes'. And "you're" is a contraction for "you are", like "you're not sleeping with me".
i had 75 notifications coming from ur status. here i was thinking i had friends.
he got promoted. that means i have now given my new boss chlaymida. i need a new job.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I'm sure me singing - rather loudly - "fuck me in the back seat" last night didn't help either.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
she gave me her number and i just said "no. cant."
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
oh btw ur so lucky i got stoned and passed out or we sooo would have bedazzled your dick while you slept. just sayin.
So my class is approximately two vomits from the bus stop. Happy first day of class
At the ER. John needs stiches. Fuck pub trivia nights.
Randomize
