why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
you seemed to enjoy falling down hill
wow, never heard the last few months of my life put so succint
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
You were passed out by the toliet and when i said i had to pee you told me to piss in the sink. Never has a girl with alcohol poisoning been so rude.
Three of my exes and one of my exes' brothers have hit me up and it's only been a week. I hate semester break.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I just got a robo call from the Addiction Help Line. Not sure how to take that.
Are you ok?!
I assume I've stopped bleeding because I haven't passed out, but can't verify currently.
He did a backflip because drugs
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize