normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
There is a bruise on my cock the size of a golfball. Bad sign.
you told the bartender not to open the bottle because you were gonna put it in your purse in case you get cut off later
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
i don't care how ready and willing she is. she is where penises go to die
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
I asked her how many times she came and she said "Oh god I can't count that high, Rutgers doesn't teach us that."
SOME BITCH AT THE HOSTEL STOLE MY NUT BUTTER THERE WILL BE BLOOD
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
The guy I slept with in AZ just called and is moving here next week.
Randomize
