he told me I talked like a deaf person
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
I saw your relationship status and wanted to write "Now you can fuck with some peace of mind that she isn't giving that other guy she met online a handjob."
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
She has the best kind of daddy issues
Uhmmmm is there really any way to tactfully ask "you into me jerking you off with my feet... or nah" cause if you find one let me know 😂
Do you wanna fuck while my apple pie is in the oven?
we just got sex advice from a midget. You better fucking get here.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
