ok i'm going to motor boat your sister now. ttyl
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
He was a level 5 clinger dude i dont need to be told how ridiculously awesome i am all the time, if so id just hang out with my mom
happy birthday! Any relationship between us is now officially illegal.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
Lube is flammable
Who is this??
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Slowly realizing that my only incentive to bathe is shower beer
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I swear to god he thought my ass was a bag of wine last night.
Randomize