Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
i've never seen someone fall down the steps so gracefully... i think im in love
So in our children's lit class, some jackass little boy had gone thru the where's waldo book and circled waldo. I realize you would have been that kid.
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
You're the second person to offer to fuck me in the bathroom at work. Idk whether I should feel honored, or if cvs is just a turn on.
I had the bathroom of girls sing you happy birthday while you puked. I couldn't stop laughing. They were all so supportive
He called me Kitten either just because or he figured out my old s&m life. Either way huge turn on.
He fucked me while wearing a unicorn horn. I think I have found the one...
Did you see her happy birthday to emily on facebook? The gist of it is like: hey emily you almost died at birth im glad you didn't. love mom.
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