I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
sellin beer in gallon jugs is both the best and worst idea ever. Im only gonna have one beer...but its gonna be 128 ounces.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
Well he's not exactly single.. It's like an open relationship his wife doesn't know about
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
ok. can u leave the new roommate a list of instructions for me? like what i need to be fed and when i need to be exercised?
Corn dogs constantly. And all.the time
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
It's a special kind of bond when your gay brother takes pics of you topless at a frat party.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I know... It's stupid... It's like, I have sex with his brother and bestfriend ONE time....
I think part of my soul drowned in beer and/or jack daniels last night.
Randomize
