I felt like helen keller
But she could have totally found that shit before me
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
You decided to make a porno with gummy bears and things went downhill from there.
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
Our phone convo was getting intense. Then I heard her say "quiet mommy is trying to have phone sex"
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
No I'm not proud of you for not sleeping with him. He has herpes. You don't get a gold star for behaving how you're expected to. Trust me. I'm a teacher.
got so drunk i was kicked out of my own birthday party and tried taking a bottle of vodka with me
He was having a "party in the princess castle." At what point do I blindfold him and take him to AA?
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
I just plagiarized Dr. Curtis Connor's ideology from Spider-man in an essay on genetically engineered embryos. College: academic integrity at its finest.
The medical term is prolapsed anal walls if you want to look into it with dignity.
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
Randomize
