And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute
What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
We found them in a dumpster making out trying to get their privacy
God I hope my hair dresser doesn't realize that all these hairspiration pictures are from gay porn blogs on tumblr.
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
My signature move is making guys wonder why they bothered in the first place
You know it was a good night when visa fraud prevention services are calling
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
