i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
Do you think if Santa was real that he's have a big penis?
the last thing i remember is inserting the sippy stray into the jack daniel's.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
what kind of wine goes with anal sex and shame?
Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.
my life is about to be the like the hunger games except with penises. and im going to win.
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
He stopped in the middle of having sex to ask me what shampoo I use. Apparently my hair smelled good
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
If that orgasm indicates how the rest of the year is going to go, I need to buy rain boots.
I knew it was Christmas when someone handed me a stocking filled with airplane bottles. Ps just woke up 3 days later
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
I will literally have glitter in my crotch for weeks.
Randomize
