I'm not ready for the Pike bikes to move back in to town it was wonderful seeing that sorority house empty all summer
... I'm KD
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Number of twigs I found in my hair: 5
Apparently coming home smelling like I took a bath in beer is frowned upon in this household. I'm so glad I don't actually live here.
Last night he ate BBQ Pringles out of my boobs...I feel like it was moderately productive
I've been on the toilet for an hour. On a six day bender. My ass feels like its leaking vodka
Figured out why that fly won't leave. It keeps buzzing through my weed smoke
Fly high, Fly.
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO BE A DRUNK WHEN ALL MY ENABLERS ARE BUSY?!
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
The streets are paved with hand jobs
Randomize