please come you make the beer taste better
oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
What do you think it is?
It's a boy. I know it. She always manages to have a cock inside her somehow.
did i paint my nails blue or do i need to make a trip to the ER?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
Just got home and found him passed out with his ass stuck in a Rubbermaid garbage can. He must have been like that for a few hours
No fucking judgements. You know me. Chinese food vent sessions are safe places.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
Nothing more awkward that being butt ass naked in a guys bed and his ex wife shows up with his kid....
I deleted all traces of him from my phone
even the dick picks he sent you?
no are you nuts? saved that shit to my camera roll
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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