I can only speak casual parseltoungue, im not bad though. just the general, "wheres the bathroom?" "open the chamber of secrets" that type of stuff
guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
You know I ate twenty hot dogs in an hour once.
I am honestly so surprised you are a lesbian.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I've had pants off for 3 hours now. America.
I was trying to decide if i was still high whenever i realized i was pressing the buttons on the microwave cause i liked the sound.
I swear to God...this day is one great big who's who in the land of fucked uppedness.
Randomize
