OKAY SO WHENEVER I SEE AN UGLY COUPLE I ALWAYS WONDER WHAT THEY SAY TO EACH OTHER IN BED. creepy?
btw, i had a dream i drank 260-proof vodka last night. thank god that doesn't exist in real life.
dude i just figured out that the tostitos sign is two people eating chips and salsa. being high totally pays off sometimes
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
He told me the color of his piss. Worst. First date. Ever.
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
Woke up covered in green glitter and beer. I am never leaving Ireland.
The object of the game was to pour tequila into a sombrero and drink as much as you can before it leaked through, 'Big Papi' won.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
I'm sobbing to NWA
Literally.... Guy kissing himself in mirror in this hotel elevator
He can move his dick. Like on its own. WHY DID I NOT GIVE BLOWJOBS BEFORE?!
I took advantage of the fact that my mentee had to go to the bathroom to throw up in the other stall. I'm going to hell for being hungover at an elementary school.
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