just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
she gave me a disgusted look and asked how i could live with myself. because i havent seen the rocky horror picture show. and then dumped me.
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
It was awkward being the only one at the wedding who knows that the bride and groom met when she gave him a lap dance at a strip club
She passed out on top of the bar. Still did body shots off her.
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
And don't worry, my exact words were "I can't believe a baby came outta that thing"
Ive seen his manscaping faults. Given the choice I'd rather dry hump a cactus
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
She was way too drunk so I dropped her off at her house and smoked a huge blunt with her mom.
Randomize
