We were making out and then he stopped and said to me, "Your ship is right there, why don't you take your people and just go?"
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
Fuuuuck. Forgot it's October. FYI scarecrows are gonna fuck you up when you're driving high
Ya well my good-girl image was pretty much blown when he found out I'm going to jail soon.
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
I already ran out of vodka but I have more beer. I just ran naked into the high school party down the street as took all theirs. ...figured no one wants to tackle the naked guy..
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Simple math equation: Up till 5 a.m. drinking + up at 9 a.m. for nephews birthday party = puking in the pool
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
1) break up with him. 2) feel bad. 3) fuck some other guy. 4) feel better. Boom! Life plan. You're welcome.
Well I've always wanted to get head while playing WoW...
K I'll do it, but mine is going to be WAY weirder. Your not allergic to shellfish, right?
She started crying, nearly punched a guy, started smoking multiple cigarets backwards and broke the slide on her bong. Why do I always end up babysitting the crazy ones?
it's like my eyeball is being humped by my eyelid
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