took 5 apple pie shots. caution: flames. not digestable.
Just left a map of the Aleutian islands on this Eskimo girls face. Check one off my Alaska to do list.
The night ended with a lot of tears and everyone singing along to Willenium
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
New scientific discovery: The hypothetical attractiveness of a woman increases exponentially as her skirt:boot ratio approaches zero. Nobel Prize in my future?
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
I have to date her. We need a place to stay when we go tailgating.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
I could of sworn you were praying in the strip club.
it wasnt a pity fuck per say. i wasnt attracted to her, but still thought 'that looks like a fun ride'
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
I am available for nakedness
I would ride that face into the sunset
Well, I like big penises but it's not like he walks around with it out or anything so yes I think he has beautiful eyes
Randomize
