just to let you know I saw you texting some Kim chick, and facebook saying she's ugly... good job you're gay now
i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
This is the guy who showed up to the first day of class with a 24 pack of coke and a handle of rum in his backpack. He doesnt play by normal people rules.
regular news: took many shots of tequila.....bad news: woke up with a toothbrush and vagisil next to me.....good news: clean as a whistle
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
whats our policy on dating high schoolers?
we dont have a policy but im pretty sure the state of michigan does
I can only get day drunk because of my medicine now, so... There's that
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
Randomize
