The plus side of face planted at the tailgate was that no one could see my nipples hanging out.
They turned the water off again. Brushed my teeth with whats left from those pitchers of mojitos. So hung over i dont even care.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
he drunk texted me to give me his number with the message "i gotchu pretty eyeso" i can't tell if he's complimenting me or himself.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
i was really hopeful that i could make it to the end of the semester without doing something stupid enough to destroy our relationship but i guess i was wrong..........thanks vodka
When you didn't respond I figured you must be busy so I'm home in my pj's 2 beers in and stoned from weed I got from my gaybours. They also gave me cake. I'm not moving from this recliner.
Drunk is not a location!
His acid is intense dude. I was just over at his place laughing about the hole in the wall I was convinced was a cat
How does one take the "you're the best sex I've ever had but I'm marrying someone that's sub-par in the sack" mind fuck?
I pity the fool.
Thanks Mr T.
This is like the fourth time this month I've woken up hungover in someone's backyard
Randomize
