pretty sure I just motor boated my professor at the drag show
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
Why the hell did you smack that girls beer out of her hand at the end of the night then buy her a double jack and coke for?
Its called bad cop laid cop.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
And thanks! There are perks to polyamory. And birthday orgies are one of them
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
the weird part wasn't waking up in someone else's underwear, it was how the cat was staring at me like he knew more about last night then i remembered.
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