i sleep in a fine layer of vodka and semen. i don't know that that would appropriate for a pajama rally.
So, we're going at it on the sink when a German kid walks in and starts brushing his teeth. I love hostel sex.
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
I keep confusing the name of her and her dog. Both are appropriate.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
Put some vodka in it
Its 7am
put some vodka in it
I just realized in a weird reversed way I hustled a stripper last night
Best thing she said after I kicked her out "rugby guys have single handedly ruined my faith in men"
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
there is partying, then there is whatever we did last night.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I think my stomach is breaking up with me. It's giving me back everything I ever gave it.
Randomize
