He disabled his match.com account in front of me
I got her a Nickelback box set.
we may have ended up at a gay bar on accident. we're gonna work this to get free drinks.
But when he came on my stomach I noticed how tan I was!
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
If I end up married to you I better get lots of orgasms to help me forget I failed at life.
A pack of naked men just sprinted down the street screaming in German. It's 5 AM.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
You don't understand. This could be the last time I shave a star into my vag. Get over here.
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Oh the best part of having sex with him was that he made me a smoothie after
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
She's like a cask of Amontillado. Very tempting if I was drunk, but sober, I know I'll get fucked over in the end.
Randomize
