Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
Just pulled my keys, cell-phone and a pack of cigarettes out from between my cleavage. This one guy's face was priceless.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
The chick who threw the party was all pissed cause she thought I made out with her boyfriend. Admittedly, I did, but she was throwing up and crying at the time so she really can't be that mad.
I have to be at work in a hour. Can you sufficiently fuck me in 35 minutes?
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
i now understand why vodka
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
I would cock slap so many things if I had a cock.
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