he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
I am at the point where deciding not to drink alone is worth a rocky music montage in and of itself.
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
It's okay that we broke up and all but it's not okay that he still has my Chick-fil-A calendar card. This month is free fries!
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
