Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Maid of honor is brides sister and single. Likes lemondrops. You're welcome.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
But here's the wonderful thing about us. It's us. You could invite me over, get really wasted and end up sleeping with someone else and id be there in the morning to take you to breakfast.
We just took back to back grav bong hits and are playing battleship. She guessed Z - 12 so weve switched board games.
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Someone came into our hotel room and took our remote
What should I do?
you told me your favorite colors were "pink" "no pants" and "Mexican food"
I'm so hung over that I just tried to send you a screen shot of the cracked screen on my phone.
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
don’t ask me. i snorted coke off of a pregnancy test box last night. i obviously don’t make the best life choices.
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