The elaphant ear plant popped a new leaf ! Wahoo !
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
Girls only wine night turned into a sloppy drunk lesbian orgy again
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
stoners and superglue do NOT mix
SMOKEY THE BEAR CAME AT US WITH FUCKING AXES IN MY DREAM I THINK IT IS A SIGN TO STOP BLAZING IT IN THE WOODS
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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