i bet if teenage jesus was here he would do a shot with me
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
I just had a cup of orange juice and thought it didnt taste right. It didnt have vodka in it.
apparently, i ordered a pogo stick last night. i can't even be mad about that.
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Anyone who has court these next few days keep your head up & smile knowing we broke the County Record with 27 underage consumptions
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
We'll just play naked Twister, the rest will take care of itself
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Randomize
