I wanna bring you to show and tell
just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
Warning...her vagina is big, like sleeping bag big.
when i got to my bed there was a handwritten note that said "wash the sheets." sleeping on the couch.
He just got home drunk. He ate 5 snack cakes, said Little Debbie's his bitch, went upstairs and fell asleep.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
All you need to do now is invest in a Speedo and start going door to door.
I took 36 pictures of my lava lamp. your weed wins.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
Please show REO speedwagon ur boobs for me.
I can't even properly respond cuz I'm ballsdeep in falafel
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
Wanna get drunk and play candy land? If so you are 2 steps behind.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
Randomize
