Memory from last night that just came back: me forcibly jacking him off while he yelled I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS I DONT LIKE HANDJOBS
you were definitelymotorboating random chicks as they walked out of the bar. just like, down the line. you kept yelling "Motor Boats for everyone!!!!"
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
love makes seman taste better
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
remember earlier when I said I was over sex with random boys? take it back take it back take it back
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
Petty good. I just stapled a 5 dollar bill onto the chest of a sword swallower.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
Prepare for massive TMI but anyway long story short I have a Swiss flag band-aid across my balls.
What a patriot you are. How'd it happen?
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
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