My mom gets in bar fights. She doesn't go to bed early.
So how gross is it that Woopie Goldberg has a vagina? She's like the exact opposite of a boner....
a dead guy is trying to sell me oxy clean on my tv
alright so where did all these fingerpaintings on my bedroom wall come from?
dude. you drew those with your dick
Nah you can have him. There's too many men in my life right now. I can't handle another dick.
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
josh has a chalupa in his pocket if you're hungry.
Fuck him for salsa, please. I heard its a good recipe.
your drunk ass trust falled a guy double fisting bud limes and as a result your head bounced off the patio table. So that might explain the stitches on the back of your head.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I feel a little uneasy about having my grandma sleep in my bed that I've banged chicks in not too long ago... Fuckin blizzards
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
Randomize