Don't forget I'm 20 now
I liked you more when you were 19
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
I am a mess. Weirdest thing: I woke up with a hammer under my pillow. No idea why.
I truly don't know anything about sober relationships. Normally I would just drunkenly yell "sex?" in a guy's face. What do I do now? Be like, sooo uhhh, wanna do it? Awkward, and even worse, I will remember clearly just how awkward it was.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
We came back and there was a shotglass filled with what looks like blood. Come over soon, we're gonna try it out.
guess who's bored in chemistry researching how to sneak weed through airport security in her vagina?
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
I've justified worse with less. I had sex with your brother because he was wearing a nice sweater
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Randomize
