She is chewing on staples and spitting them at her cat, I think it's time to leave..
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I don't fucking care about the convenience of not having freudian slips. I spent 2009-2011 screwing around with 3 different Daniels. 2012 WILL be the dawn of a new day
How about a mike?
Already had two of those
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
I'm hoping that by this time next year we will be smoking some weed at a gay wedding, asking "Mitt who?"
I feel like you're gonna be reading this at 6 AM in a ditch or under a bridge, but please remember...I offered to drive you home. And you said no.
The sad thing is that it's 6:45 and you're not far off.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
They have beer where we have blood.
Self care is breaking into nasa and launching yourself directly into the fucking void
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
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