Do you ever think God made girls unattractive around their periods as a warning?
Hey I found a place that'll do a hand job for 42 bucks
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
Just had a threesome. Girlfriend wasn't a part of it. Broke up with her by sending her a picture of it. Hell is going to be awesome
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
I'm so hungover that I just wrote up my will because I'm afraid I'm gonna die. I'm leaving you my bong.
Do you think it would be weird to wear a shirt that says 'big fun small package' from an ex for a first date?
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