Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Literally best acid trip ever. Better than sex. At one point she looked over at me, started crying, holds up her hands and said "dinosaur tears of sadness". Craziest roommate ever.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
I've decided that I'm okay with you getting a goat. I have to get over my completely rational fear of goats somehow.
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
the fact that you trapped hornets in a mailing tube to put in his mailbox does not surprise me sadly.
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
I just gave my boss a blowjob. underneath his desk at work. that promotion is mine!
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
Randomize
