Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
No, that was the night I helicoptered my dick to oncoming traffic. Im talking about the night I ran naked down the street.
Tell me again why I left before the topless cake fight
I want morning sex. We can incorporate maple syrup into it somehow, it'll be fun
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I had my room mate call my phone after last night and it was in an uncooked quesadilla
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
so is it socially acceptable to send her an "i got my man back you whore" card?
Randomize
