He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
In America we eat man semen.
what is the most politically correct way to ask if he still hangs out with the guy that has blue hair and make meth in his car?
She gives pretty bad head, but when it's in her dad's Lexus SUV it's tough to complain.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
Are we in any of the areas with tornados?
Dude, i don't even have pants on yet, it's too early to think about tornadoes.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
Can I chase this vodka with an onion?
I knew I'd like her from the moment she supported me messing around with my co-worker on my lunch break
Taco Bell is giving high school kids free tacos STEAL YOUR BROTHER'S WALLET I'LL BRING THE WEED.
I am googling "notable people who had syphilis"
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
i'm sitting in bed scratching my boobs and wearing a sparkly fedora and have no one to blame but myself
It's like every time I'm baked I discover my fingers all over again.
Randomize
